Tuesday, June 2, 2015

ADHD Medication and Addiction

I still struggle with the question "am I addicted to my ADHD medication?" Maybe I am so dependent on it because it works well. It also gives me anxiety which often leads to my taking another pill. That's the part that worries me.

I take extra, then have to go a wretched week without it, wishing I hadn't taken extra and vowing to not do it again. Then I get my refill for the month and it starts all over again. To stay on track so I don't have to go to work without it, I need to hold on taking my medicines for two weekends. That should put me back on track.

I know ADHD meds can be difficult managing correctly, and I am currently on two - Vyvanse and Ritalin. I wish I could experience the first two hours of my Vyvanse all day, but the "high" productivity fades, and that's where the Ritalin comes in. I take one twice a day, four hours apart from each other. But those four hours are often cut in half, and sometimes I take double doses. This leaves me even more anxious with regret and shame sprinkled in.

I write about my medication struggles in hopes that it helps someone reading this know they are not alone in this daily battle. I realize I have not prayed for the strength to take my ADHD meds as prescribed. Prayer and faith may be just what the Doctor ordered.

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