Monday, November 29, 2010

Some Monday

My emotions and mood have been so up and down. Right now, I am down. I spent the weekend with Mr. P and we did lots of fun stuff with his dad and mom. I felt okay, but it did cross my mind quite a few times how nice it would be to be alone in my room in bed cuddling with my dog. I don't know if this is because I am a home-body, or if it's depression. Or, is it anxiety?

I am in bed as we speak. It's noon on a Monday. The thought of getting out of the house to look for a job is overwhelming. I will be working evenings at the theatre beginning either tonight or tomorrow night. It's not like I have money in the bank to buy me time to allow me the luxury of being in bed on Monday afternoon. But this isn't luxury to me. I'm not enjoying myself.

I have this feeling...of just not caring. I feel numb. I want to be locked away from the world. I feel drained and tired and sad and empty.

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