Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Progress + Sadness

I feel sad.  

It was an okay day.  I told old jewish lady boss to shove it.  I have three interviews between Monday and Tuesday, and with the holiday season upon us I'll have no problem finding a replacement job.  Nuts Lady was a bitch, she insulted my intelligence and the uniqueness that is me on many occassions.  She said she doesn't see how I got a degree when I don't even know how to make a fax.  Who faxes anymore?!  So, I put the paper in the wrong way, but you know what -- I can set up a home or office network.  Now what?  She picked and pecked and prodded -- said I wrote like a child, and would correct my english.  English is my FIRST language, so back off.

I organized my room and closet when I got home from work.  It is so awesome!  Super organized with all of my clothes, purses, shoes, and scarves displayed nicely.  My roommate decorated the living room and downstairs halfbath last weekend and she did such an amazing job!  I love our place.  And to think....just two months ago I was bouncing from couch to couch, displaced and in despair.

So why then, after coming so far, do I still feel.......sad?  It's this underlying sorrow just below my skin.  Hidden from the outside looking in, but muddied from the inside looking out.  My sadness just -- is.  And for today, for right now, I am okay with that.


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