Monday, April 5, 2010

One step forward...

two steps back. Maybe even three.

A seemingly good night out on the town turned into a second night on the town, which turned out to be very bad. I thought I could do it. I thought I could go out and have a few drinks and have a little fun. Boy was I wrong. empty

Again, I drank too much. Again, I ran my mouth on an angry rampage, unleashing all of my pent up frustrations on unsuspecting bar-goers out to have a fun night themselves.

Why? I really need to search deep inside myself, and find out why.

It's not okay. I'm not okay. Who knows who could have seen me out that night, out of control and out to satisfy some kind of deep sorrow I am obviously manifesting. It was pathetic. Maybe if this were the first time, then I could chalk it up as "one too many drinks". But this was not the first time, and it won't be the last time - unless I sincerely decide to no longer drink.

And I think after this past weekend, that might not be such a bad idea.

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